golf jokes
Home | Links | Send us a Joke | | Contact
Go to the golfjokes.co.uk home page





   
 





Joke Categories


Caddies
Cartoons
Dictionary
Excuses
Famous Golfers
Golf Quotes
Golfing Laws
Golfing Lists
Golfing Truths
Her Indoors
Life & Death
Miscellaneous
One Liners
Religion & Golf
Rule Exceptions
The Golf Pro
Woman Golfers
X Rated Golf
You Scored ?!!?

 

 




Prime Golfing Laws...


Last Joke | Next Joke

All change is for the worse, except for underwear.
All current problems can be traced to previous solutions.
Anything that can go right, will go way, way right.
Anything that can go wrong will wait to go wrong until after you leave the practice tee.
Anything works for three holes.
Everyone would like to get much better at golf, but they'll settle for you playing a whole lot worse.
Hit the do-over first.
If it ain't broke, don't fiddle with your grip.
If you address the ball for more than twenty seconds its not a waggle, it's a seizure.
If you can keep your head when the wheels come off, you need a new head.
It's often necessary to hit a second drive to really appreciate the first one.
No matter how badly you're playing, you can always play worse.
Tennis would be as difficult as golf if you only got one serve, six love was par, you had to wait ten minutes between points, you often lost a dozen balls in a single set and every now and then you needed to hit a backhand out of a tree.
The game of golf is 90% mental and 10% mental
The only thing of actual value that you can take from the driving range to the first tee is a pocketful of range balls.
The only time you play absolutely flawless golf is when you are doing everything in your power to lose to your boss.
The reason golf is so popular is that it gives people cooped up in the office all week and chance to lie and cheat outdoors.
The reason so many golfers take up fly fishing is that the motion of casting with the rod is easily mastered by anyone who ever threw a club.
The reason you do so well at the driving range is because it's really not that hard to hit the horizon in regulation.
The stages of a golfers game are sudden collapse, radical change, complete frustration, slow improvement, brief mastery and sudden collapse.
There are no little problems.
There are no minor adjustments.
There are no tiny pieces of advice.
To hit a really awful shot in golf, mere incompetence is not enough. You really need an audience.
What worked yesterday won't work today.
Whatever you think you're doing wrong is the one thing you're doing right.







Return to the top of the page Go to the home page of golfjokes.co.uk


Last Joke Next Joke


 

© 2000-13 golfjokes.co.uk Copyright Notice - Privacy - Part of the HumourHub network | Send this page to a friend